Rumahoy - Time II: Party

I'm not going to lie. My main takeaway from Rumahoy's cleverly named Time II: Party is 'The Pirate Metal Scene is really fucking weird man.' That's really what this band comes down too. They are playing fun pirate metal, perhaps not at the same level as Alestorm, but remaining really goddamn fun regardless. That being said Rumahoy have crafted a record here that is self referential, silly and over the top. Sure they might not have the chops of some of their peers but it doesn't matter because you'll be having too good a time to notice.

There are so many weird layers to unpack here, from calling out the bands peers to a guest spot from Alestorm's Christopher Bowes. Having billed themselves as "Scotlands Greatest Pirate Metal Band" it would only be fitting that the album closer be a parody of a track from "Scotlands Second Greatest Pirate Metal Band" - Alestorm. While they definitely are not as good as Alestorm (The less melodic vocals in particular don't do it for me here) they remain a whole lot of fun. There is clear jig pit material with tracks like 'Time to Party' and the dance vibes of 'Poop Deck Party' are guaranteed to put a smile on your face.

So yes there are a lot of corny elements here, but Rumahoy know it. This was never meant to be some sort of great art, it's just a record that's going to make you smile, mosh and sing-a-long loudly. This is the kind of stuff that has been perfectly crafted for the European festival stage. They are drunk, loud and proud. Who isn't going to love some of the most absurd metal ever committed to wax? There's literally a song about a gun made out of treasure, yes it's stupid, but also you gotta love it. And that's really what this album is in a nutshell.

Find them on Facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/rumahoy/

Alestorm - Curse Of The Crystal Coconut

'We're just hear to have fun, get drunk and make loads of money!' Alestorm boisterously proclaim on their opening track, 'Treasure Chest Party Quest'. Their new record Curse Of The Crystal Coconut is another truly excellent offering. The band has positioned themselves as the ultimate festival act. The group who you NEED to see because even after a decade of doing it they are finding ways to make their festival appearances even more exciting, fun and action packed. This new collection of songs will only elevate the band.

Alestorm has long been to ridiculous for most, and this record changes none of that. With tracks like 'Zombies Ate My Pirate Ship' the band are just as silly as ever. Beyond that though there are still the standard pirate metal tracks here, oftentimes paired with some of the more bizarre elements of the bands discography. As with their last offering, No Grave But The Sea the band certainly leans into the more bro-y aspect of festival culture here, tongue in cheek as always. Even the surprisingly introspective 'Call Of The Waves' starts with a look inwards before descending into an anthem about conquering the oceans.

In other words - Alestorm continue to be the kings of feel good pirate metal. Guest appearances from members of Finntroll, Rumahoy and Patty Gurdy of Patty Gurdy's Circle provide breadth to the record, and remind us that through it all Alestorm are looking to grow as musicians and embrace more unique collaborations. This is a fun record that is going to remain fun, over the top and more than a little bit ridiculous. Alestorm have always been a blast to listen too and now more than ever they seem ready to take on the world.

Find them on Facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/alestormband/

Alestorm - No Grave But The Sea

It's hard to believe that Alestorm have five records out now. Not only that, but the core joke that defines the band remains hilarious and the groups songwriting seems to only get better. A record that pushes their boundaries further than ever before and still pays tribute to the inherent silliness of the band, No Grave But The Sea is another triumphant achievement for one of heavy metals most unique bands. This is a band who have never followed your goddamn rules and who instead revel in the sheer madness that is pirate metal.

While all the typical Alestorm tropes are met here, even from the first track, it's still obvious that the band is exploring new directions. It's an interesting balance that they strike, between standard Alestorm rockers like Mexico and some of the more in depth compositions. The thing that generally strikes me with this record though is that No Grave But The Sea is perhaps one of the best written and arranged records of the year. As hard as it might be to admit, Alestorm are a goddamn pop band and they love it. They have some of the most unique melodies and potent songwriting that I have ever heard and this record simply pushes it to the next grandiose level.

When this band started off I think it was easy to dismiss them as a mere gimmick. It was easy to say "Oh pirate metal will never last, that's just little kid shit." Well now here we are a motherfucking decade later and Alestorm are still on top. If you can't come to accept the fact that the heavy metal pirates are here to stay with tales of the Pentahook, Pegleg Potion and Treasure Island then you are never going to truly get it. Alestorm can't help but to expand, damn the consequences. Their sonic pallet will constantly expand, proving their burning supremacy. 

Find them on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/alestormband/

Dan's Top 10 of 2014

The roast beast has been eaten, the who-hash has been smoked, and the time for end of the year lists is finally upon us! To say 2014 was an above average year for heavy metal seems like kind of an understatement. Such an overwhelming number of good releases poured out that even as I look back upon my final selections I know there are some great artists I've left out, Including some releases which didn't make the cut simply on grounds of being EP's (Trepalium's spectacular and hilarious "Voodoo Moonshine"), not being quite metal enough to justify a place on the list (The Birthday Massacre's fantastic new release "Superstition") or barely missing the cut like Equilibrium, Eluveitie, and Arkona, all of whom had great releases this year. But alas, as Highlander taught us, there can only be one, so here it is, my top ten metal albums of 2014! 

10. The Contortionist - Language , Intervals - A Voice Within, Monuments -The Amanuensis

Yes the list starts with a tie, yes I know that's sort of cheating, I told you, this was a hard top ten to pick! The Djent scene has been the source of endless criticism over the past few years since its explosion and popularity, and in part with good reason. There’s been a lot of unimaginative derivative stuff released since the genre’s explosion, as happens with any genre after it gets popular, but my god has the good music to come out of the scene been good. For the first entry on this list, I decided to tie three of this year's great Djent releases, each adding something slightly different and new to the style's ever expanding sound. Firstly there’s “Language," the latest offering from Indiana’s The Contortionist. The band's sound has continued to become more clearly defined and seems to have reached its full potential with this latest release, with their combination of spacy, strange, atmospheric prog with balls-to-the-walls, intense, heavy riffage as effective as it's ever been.  Next we have “A Voice Within,” the debut full-length album from Toronto’s exceptionally talented prog metallers Intervals. In addition to being one of the tightest playing live bands I've had the pleasure of seeing, the sheer technical skill of these musicians helps them stand out from their peers. With the addition of former HAARP Machine vocalist Mike Semesky, this is the first album from Intervals to feature vocals, and it certainly adds another dimension to their sound. Semsky delivers, providing powerful emotional cleans throughout the album. Though the addition of more harsh vocals could help the band round out their sound a bit more, “A Voice Within” is an excellent first venture into full-lengths for the band. Lastly there is England’s Monuments with their second full-length album “The Amuensis,” and all I can say is oh my god you guys the riffs. The singing is perfectly adequate and does help to avoid the potential monotony of a fully instrumental release, but what really shines on this album is the extremely technical and thoroughly well-written instrumental material, particularly that of guitarists Olly Steele and Adam Swan. If you're an aspiring guitar player and looking for more killer guitar licks to learn, this is a good one for you, and the band's crushing tone is sure to satisfy anyone in search of bassy djent goodness.

9. Agalloch - The Serpent and The Sphere

It’s a testament to how great a year 2014 was for heavy metal that this album only made it to number nine on this list. Agalloch have been arguably one of the most important bands in the U.S. metal scene since their creation, redefining both black metal and folk metal with their primal, atmospheric, grim, and wondrous sound that they have carefully crafted over the years. While the magic found on “The Mantle” may be impossible to recapture, the band has yet to release an album which is less than superb, and “The Serpent and The Sphere" is no exception. The heartbreaking melodies, calming folky acoustic guitars, magnificent songwriting, harsh reptilian growls, and immersive atmospheres that have defined their sound continue to place them ahead of the competition. Ever the perfect companion for a nature walk, Agalloch continue to capture something primordial and ageless in their music which seems to be drawn from the very heart of the earth, and much like another band further down on this list, they seem inexorably tied to their native landscape. One can barely listen to songs like “Dark Matter Gods” and “Plateau of Ages” without feeling  the rocks, streams, mountains, and dense forests of Oregon all around you.  Though perhaps not quite as groundbreaking as their previous output, “The Serpent and The Sphere” is a must-have for any fan of black metal, folk metal, or progressive metal, and has rightfully continued the band's monumental legacy.

8. Sabaton - Heroes

It’s official at this point, Joakim Brodén can do no wrong. With the possible exception of “Metalizer,” (and let’s be real, who counts "Metalizer"?) each album Sabaton has released has managed to deliver the same powerful, anthemic, militaristic sound the band has become known and loved for, while improving on the old theme time and time again. The band’s 2012 magnum opus “Carolus Rex” is a hard album to follow, but Sabaton proved themselves up to the task this year with the release of the exceptional “Heroes." The album is a tribute to various individuals who committed remarkable acts of heroism over the course of the World War II and has songs praising the heroes of a number of different nations and forces over the course of the album. These include Audie Murphy, the author of “To Hell and Back” and one of the most decorated soldiers of the entire war, and Lauri Törni, a Finnish soldier who served both as a Finnish Army captain, as a Hauptsturmführer in the Waffen S.S., and as a Green Beret in the U.S. Special Forces. From the fist pumpingly anthemic “Soldier of Three Armies," to the relentlessly thunderous “Night Witches," to the slow and melancholic “Inmate 4859,”  the album proves that Sabaton remains at the top of their game, and that new guitarists Chris Rörland and Thobbe Englund are more than up to the task of filling their predecessors' enormous shoes. For anyone in 2014 craving pulse-pounding power metal written for the military history nerd in every metalhead, “Heroes” was the perfect fix.

7. Alestorm - Sunset on The Golden Age

Three words: “Surf Squid Warfare.”  I don't care if it makes me un-kvlt, I love Alestorm from the bottom of my metal heart, and “Sunset on The Golden Age” is no exception. How pirate metal’s favourite drunkards have managed to stay fun and fresh for four albums of silly songs about piracy, wenches, sea-monsters and booze is beyond me, but they've done it, and for that I am incredibly thankful. The effectively titled “Drink,” the epic “Mead From Hell," and the fucking amazing cover of Taio Cruz’s “Hangover” add themselves to the increasingly long list of spectacular drinking songs the band has released, and any folk metaller worth their salt spent at least one night this August drunkenly singing along to these tracks with a glass full of mead.  Much of the album is also unsurprisingly hilarious, which really kind of goes without saying with Alestorm by this point, but these sorts of songs remain utterly delightful, and I promise you that you will be replaying “Surf Squid Warfare,” “Quest for Ships,” and “Wooden Leg” til your now-antique iPod breaks. The band also saves some room for the more-serious tracks with “Magnetic North” and the title track “Sunset on The Golden Age,” both piratey symphonic epics and thoroughly well done, as well as my personal favourite from this album “1741 (The Battle Of Cartagena)." The track tells a fictionalised account of The Battle of Cartagena, the most historic battle of The War of Jenkins' Ear. The songs chiptune intro, instantly memorable pennywhistle melody, sing-along chorus, and incredibly heavy bridge all combine with the enthralling story to make up a uniquely awesome offering from the band. If you hate Alestorm already, this album probably won’t turn you around on them, but for fans of the band “Sunset on The Golden Age” definitely delivers exactly what you were hoping for in a fourth Alestorm album.

6. Witch Mountain - Mobile of Angels

The past decade has seen the dawn of a new and brilliant form of Doom Metal in the form of the psychedelic/occult doom metal oeuvre, with Jex Thoth, Uncle Acid and The Deadbeats, In Solitude, Jess and The Ancient Ones, Mount Salem, Blood Ceremony, and Witch Mountain all making their own unique mark on the genre. With the release of their most recent album “Mobile of Angels,” however, Witch Mountain seem to have finally reached their zenith. Their previous albums have been exceptionally good, but with “Mobile of Angels” the band has cemented their place as one of the greats of the current metal scene in the U.S. With just the first track, “Psycho Animundi", the band shows how far they have come, and how much more they have to show us, combining elements of Pink Floyd, Jefferson Airplane, Janis Joplin, and other psychedelic rock with heavy metal as they have done before, but this time in the perfect proportions with a truly spectacular result. The instrumentals have become more dynamic, with more clean guitar and bass breaks and dreamy light sections to balance out the plodding, heavy doom riffs one expects from the band. As per usual, all is brought together by the magnificent voice of the band's now ex-frontwoman Uta Plotkin which shines through as the focal point, with a vocal quality both enigmatic, powerful, vulnerable, soulful, and thoroughly her own. Specific tracks do stand out, as with the aforementioned “Psycho Animundi,” the trippy and ominous Hammond Organ-filled title track “Mobile of Angels,” and the melancholy and  thoroughly beautiful “The Shape Truth Takes," but the album should definitely be experienced from beginning to end, as the masterpiece that it is. If you haven't picked it up already, do yourself a favor and prepare for something new, familiar, and brilliant.

5. Panopticon - Roads to The North

This was a truly excellent year for Black Metal, particularly if you favor the folky American variety, with the two bands most associated with the sound, Agalloch and Panopticon, both releasing new albums. While both are fantastic records in their own right, each in some way echoing the ruggedness of the wild American landscape while bringing unique outside elements to intensify and enrich their base of black metal, “Roads to The North” album which has ultimately stuck with me more of the two. Austin Lunn continues to prove himself innovative and imaginative as a songwriter and a sculptor of vibrant images and narratives through music, each track reverberating with the images, scents, and sounds of the Kentucky wilderness, its enormous mountains and deep forests coming through in each note. From the thunderous yet melancholic “The Echoes of a Disharmonic Evening,"- which also features the most impressive guitar work we've heard from Panopticon yet, with some truly impressive riffing and soloing - to the thoroughly Appalachian “The Long Road” sequence, to the soaring majestic conclusion of “Chase The Grain” with its soaring fiddle and inspiring melodies, the album is truly a journey, and one thoroughly worth taking as we witness Lunn break down even more of the walls around what “black metal,'" “folk metal," and “prog metal” mean.

4. Myrkur - Myrkur

Every time I feel like all the territory to be explored in traditional black metal has been charted, that there’s nothing fresh to be done without adding a new genre or element to the mix, I end up being surprised. Unsurprisingly, the project that proved me wrong this year hails from the shores of Scandinavia, in the form of the enigmatic, beautiful, and primordial sound of Myrkur and their eponymous debut album. The brainchild of Danish-born pop singer and model Amalie Bruun, Myrkur serves as yet another example of the increasingly common one-person black metal project, and as one of the first female-fronted ones, as well as one of the ones to best capture what made the black metal of the early to mid-nineties so staggeringly good. The album starts off deceptively light and floaty, with atmospheric vocals simultaneously reminiscent of Enya and Gregorian chant, which gradually gives way to expressive black metal riffing before the two join together. Indeed the vocals are almost entirely clean until track three, “Må du brænde i helvede,” at which point the tone of the album shifts in a very different direction. The first two tracks lull you into a sense of security, both peaceful and elegant ambient black metal tracks reminiscent of Alcest or Amesoeurs. “Må du brænde i helvede,” meanwhile, brings forth two of the other obvious main influences of the album, Darkthrone and Burzum. The drumming, while not as fast and unrelenting as the likes of Hellhammerer or Frost, shares Fenriz’s primal earthy quality and punky delivery and serves perfectly for the dramatic mid-tempo black metal Myrkur is creating. The riffs, meanwhile, are reminiscent of Varg Vikernes on his best day, each one memorable, sinister and dissonant. In addition Brunn delivers blood-curdling black metal shrieks through burzum-like distorted vocal filters which exude sheer ferocity. Myrkur manages to perfectly capture the “necro” sound, all of the unnecessary clarity stripped away in favour of raw, cold, distorted chaos. Brunn has cited the harsh, majestic landscape of her native Denmark as a key influence in her songwriting, and it is extremely evident in the type of black metal she creates. The lulling ethereal acapella chants, and the grim, relentless black metal combine to create a majestic musical landscape of both breathtaking beauty and harsh, cold bleakness. While this is Brunn’s first excursion into the black metal oeuvre, I certainly hope it won't be her last, and I will certainly be excitedly awaiting the project's future output.

3. Devin Townsend Project - Z2

Oh come on, you knew this was going to be on this list somewhere, it’s Devin Townsend for Christ's Sake! I'm beginning to think that with his current release schedule Mr. Townsend has either figured out some way to slow the progression of time or is just some sort of Music God sent to earth not unlike Ziltoid himself to be our Heavy Metal savior.  The awesomeness of “Z2 "is twofold, as is the album itself of course, being split between the first album, “Sky Blue,” and the second album “Dark Matters,” “Sky Blue” feels like the spiritual successor to both “Addicted” and “Epicloud”, and ends up eclipsing the latter if not the former.  The album features beautiful melodies and atmospheres, powerful vocals, from both Devin himself and guest vocalist Anneke Van Giersbergen who also provided her distinct euro-pop infused voice to the two previously mentioned albums, and of course Devin Townsend’s trademark lush and expressive production, which remains truly second to none. Both the  chilled out ballady tracks like and “Rain City”, and “Forever”, the rousing progressive pop-metal anthems like “Rejoice,” “Universal Flame,” “Sky Blue,” and “Before We Die” are sure to live on in the DTP cannon as classics, and easily measure up to his previously lauded material. “Dark Matters” is perhaps even more delightful if that’s possible, and while it may not have the emotional impact of “Sky Blue” it’s a thoroughly enjoyable listen, and equal parts epic and hilarious, as one would expect from the next chapter in the Ziltoid saga. The high point in my opinion comes when the character of War Princess is introduced, as voiced by Stolen Babies’ exceptionally talented frontwoman Dominique Lenore Persi, who lends her awesome voice to the tracks “War Princess,” and “March of The Poozers.” If you're looking for fun sci-fi themed prog metal look no further, “Dark Matters” is the album for you. Although perhaps not quite as groundbreaking and perfect as its predecessor “Ziltoid The Omniscient” , it’s still Devin Townsend at his most hilarious and most skilled, and it’s hard to get that wrong. All in all Devin Townsend has shown us that after his involvement in dozens of albums over the years he still isn't out of ideas, and can still crank out new classics with fresh elements we never would have expected.

2. Destiny Potato - Lun

You know that feeling when you're anticipating an album release and are absolutely positive it can’t live up to your grand expectations? That’s how it was with me and Lun, the heavily delayed debut from Serbian prog-metallers Destiny Potato. A friend had played me the band’s demo and the spectacular solo albums that the band’s guitarist and main songwriter, David Maxim Micic, and I was enthralled from the first note. The unique combination of electronica, progressive metal, Eastern European melodies, djenty riffing, pop,  and Devin Townsend-esque wall of sound style production was like nothing I had heard before. I was even further drawn in upon listening to the band’s first single, “Dark Side of You” which remains one of the most unique heavy metal tracks I've had the pleasure of hearing and which I continue to listen to excessively. After about two years of waiting and hearing the album was just around the corner, last May “Lun” was finally released, and never have I been more relieved or delighted to hear exactly the album I wanted from a band. Though there are a couple of less than perfect tracks on the album, (“Take a Picture” was interesting as a novelty but didn’t serve as a solid replacement for “Dark Side of You”) the album is by and large a masterpiece. Tracks like “Indifferent,” “Blue Sun,” “Love Song,” “U.Y.M.,” and “Lunatic” absolutely exude energy and  use the bands pop influence to great effect, creating some of the most catchy, joyful, captivating metal I've heard in ages. For fans of heavier stuff there’s also “Lost Dream” and “Addict” both featuring some of David Maxim’s most spectacular riffing. I would also be remiss not to mention the strange almost avant garde delight that is “Lunatic”, sure to please fans of Diablo Swing Orchestra or any of Mike Patton’s work, as well as the chill and reflective interlude piece “Machine,” a beautiful track reminiscent of much of Devin Townsend’s lighter work.  a piece ideal for a rainy sunday afternoon. I can't recommend this album highly enough. It is one of the albums I've sun the most this year and I imagine I'll probably be doing so with some frequency in the future as well. The Serbian prog metal scene continues to be one of the most fascinating and vibrant new scenes to recently emerge and I can't wait ‘til the band’s next release.

1. Destrage - Are You Kidding Me? No.

Now I know what you're asking, “But Daniel, how could something possibly rank higher than, “Lun”? You're mad I say, MAD!”. Now first of all stop shouting, second of all what if I were to tell you that there’s an album that sounds like a weirder more melodic Dillinger Escape Plan if they were having 80% more fun and were even more virtuosic? Well my friends kindly allow me to point you in the direction of “Are You Kidding Me? No..” No one had as much fun making an album in 2014 as these guys did and it’s clear in the music. Even the dark songs on the album exude joy and passion and most noticeably energy.  The music is relentless, ever shifting, intensely heavy, but catchy, discordant but melodic, salty but sweet, both a shampoo and a conditioner! Though they've been around since the mid two-thousands Destrage are reaching a peak in their popularity, and for obvious reasons. Nothing Sounds like this album. Sure you can compare it to some of Mike Patton’s work or Dillinger Escape Plan and maybe a few others but any of those would be massively insufficient to describe the sound. Electronica, hardcore punk, groove metal, avant garde metal, prog metal, mathcore, sleazy hard rock and any number of other genres seamlessly fuse into a glorious explosion of fun and energy, like a Toys ‘R Us exploding or something. In addition Destrage have managed to write some of the most genuinely funny metal to come forth in a while, alongside lyrics containing  interesting social commentary or other topics. From “My Green Neighbor”, a song which bears listening to on repeat for hours and serves as a psychological and sociological analysis of societies obsession with zombies and the role that the zombie apocalypse theme serves in society, to “Purania” an attack on the idea of “purity” in music, and “Hosts, Rifles, and Coke” which deals with the current political landscape in Italy and the hypocrisy of it’s right wing, there’s a lot to take in. It’d be easy to write pages on each song, but at the end of the day, this is an album that everyone should experience for themselves. The combination of, some of the tightest playing of the year, creative songwriting, it’s utterly unique sound, and just how insanely fucking fun it is make this one an unquestionable shoo-in for the best metal album of 2014.

Matt Bacon's top 10 of 2014

Well it's that time of year, the time where I get drunk alone in my bedroom and write about my favorite records of the year. This time around things weren't as clear cut as last year, metal (And music in general) seemed to be a lot more divided, and through all the exciting developments and concerts I saw, there were some records that really stuck out and proved to be true masterworks that will hopefully ring out for years to come. Of course these lists hardly ever work, my top records from 2013 and 2012 both didn't make my list, so y'know... there's that, but hey, at least it gives bands something to be proud of, and by god, do the bands on this list deserve it.

10. Cretin - Stranger
Holy shit is this record angry. Beyond that I'm not sure what to say. The bands first record in eight years, this is one of the most exciting pieces of grindcore madness that I have heard come out in a very long time. Cretin know how to put together a song, and with their macabre sense of humor and wonderfully demented choruses Stranger is all you could want from a grind album. These guys have put out something that simply takes the genre to a new level, and I desperately hope it's not eight years before their next record.

9. Alestorm - Sunset on The Golden Age
A perennial favorite, I was originally not going to put this record on my top 10, and then I realized that I know all the words on this record which kind of forces me to put it here. Far too enjoyable, Alestorm have always put out music that makes me smile. This record will capture your imagination and guide you on a journey over the waves. They understand what they want to do, and no other band in the world is even close to imitating them. The most diverse record yet from these pirate metal masters, I'm excited for what the future holds for these guys.

8. Gridlink - Longhena
I didn't think 2014 would see me putting two grindcore releases in my top ten, but here we are. Packed with emotion and wonderfully fast, this twenty one minute masterpiece is going to stay as a landmark for the genre for years to come. Proof of the eternal glory of this band, few records have excited me this year as much as this latest release from Gridlink. A grind record that has acoustic parts (I shit you not) this album never fails to capture the imagination and it's so goddamn short that you can spin it three times without getting tired or oversaturated, truly an album for the ages.

7. Revocation - Deathless
What always gets me about Revocation is that not only are they putting out a release every year at this point, but also, these albums, without fail make it into a lot of people top 10 lists. Clearly these guys are doing something very right. Perhaps the defining heavy act of the 2010's I can literally find no fault with this record. Evolving on previous ideas and always wonderfully heavy, Deathless is proof that there is still a lot to be said in death metal and Revocation are perhaps the worlds primary pioneers in the genre right now.

6. Lord Mantis - Death Mask
I had the honor of meeting Charlie Fell at Housecore this year and it was truly an honor. The thing that struck me though, is that as cool as he is, Charlie Fell is a really fucked up dude, and that's kind of what makes his music so good. Lord Mantis have done something truly magnificent and extremely demented with Death Mask the sort of thing that critics will be puzzling over for years to come. Determined to fuck you up, Lord Mantis may be essentially over now, but it had a magical and fucking twisted run.

5. Supercharger - Broken Hearts And Fallaparts
This album has literally everything I love about rock and roll. With completely perfect production, awesome riffs and huge choruses I am fairly convinced that it is impossible to hate this record. Broken Hearts And Fallaparts is just way too much fun to listen too and proves that rock and roll isn't dead. This album has stayed in heavy rotation for me throughout the year and I wish more people found out about this band, because by God they could very well save the genre I owe my very career and life to.

4. Insanity Alert - Insanity Alert
When I describe Insanity Alert to my friends, which I do all the time because I fucking LOVE this band, I call them 'more Municipal Waste than Municipal Waste" These guys are fast and fun, the sort of thrashmageddon that only true devotees to the genre can understand. Self referential and filled with jokes about metal and comic books fans of party thrash will immediately fall in love with this album, it's the sort of thrash release I've always wanted. Years in the making, I don't see how Insanity Alert could ever top this.

3. Agalloch - The Serpent and the Sphere
There are two types of people in this world. People who like Agalloch and people who I don't like. This record is absolutely stellar and every metalhead (And many non metalheads) should be able to appreciate what this band is all about. A truly majestic release, The Serpent and the Sphere never fails to capture my imagination and keep me going through the hard times. This album is proof of the constant evolution of Agalloch and leaves me hungrier than ever to see them live, something that will hopefully happen within the next year.

2. Yob - Clearing the Path to Ascend
Yob, one syllable, yet so much meaning. Clearing the Path to Ascend will capture your imagination and leave you in awe. An album seemingly destined for vinyl this is one of the most powerful and touching doom release I have ever heard and almost certainly Yob's best yet. Yob understand the human condition and Clearing the Path to Ascend deals directly with that. As you 'wake up' and come to terms with the masterwork that is Clearing the Path to Ascend it's hard to fall back into reality. This album takes you on a journey you don't want to end.

1. Cynic -Kindly Bent To Free Us
I actually have to be careful when I choose to listen to this record because it invariably makes me cry. I first heard this record back in 2013 at the release party, and since then I knew that this album was going to be truly special. Cynic are the true lords of prog, and this is perhaps their most honest record yet. Kindly Bent To Free Us shows the world a band who are on top of their game and seemingly destined to dominate the prog world. Beautifully emotional and endlessly thought provoking, for me at least this is Cynics best record, and one I will never forget.

Alestorm-Sunset on the Golden Age

Alestorm was one of the first metal bands I got in too. I recall being fourteen and hearing their first two records and getting pumped for the third. When the third did come out, I wrote a review which I then sent to the bands frontman Chris, and he responded, thanking me for my kind words. That was one of those strange defining moments that made me realize this blog was going to end up being my livelihood (And now it more or less is) So, when I say the pirates are back and better than ever, it's kind of a big deal, Alestorm are legends in their own lifetimes, and Sunset on the Golden Age is in fact a brave new dawn.

See, Alestorm have come across something magical, sure they're not the first song to create outrageous folk metal party tracks like Drink, but they are the first to be able to hit a mass market with it. There is something distinctly glorious about being a heavy metal pirate. This record sees the band pushing themselves pretty far stylistically though, the track Hangover has a modern pop feel (not that it's bad, just very different) and Sunset on the Golden Age is the bands longest effort yet. That being said, there are also bits on tracks like Wooden Leg where the group gets more death metal, or even grindcore than ever before. Alestorm is growing, but they are not giving up on the silliness and the hooks that make their sound so enjoyable.

In short, Sunset on the Golden Age is proof that despite everything, Alestorm will triumph. Through the fire and the flames, Gloryhammer and all, this is the band who will reign triumphant over metalheads hearts for years to come. Alestorm get what the fans want and they deliver, but it's always interesting and exciting because sure these guys come off as alcoholic partiers (And to some degree they are) but they're also incredible musicians who understand how to create albums that engage and excite the listener. It's comforting to know that in 2014 you can make your living as a pirate, and it reminds us all, heavy metal will never die.

Find them on Facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/alestormband

Ol' Jolly Roger

Ol' Jolly Roger claims to be Portugals only pirate metal band, and given my (albeit rather limited) research, this seems to set them apart from many of the other great bands on their scene. With a fun new demo out entitled From the Depths We Rise it's easy to see that these guys very much appreciate the influence of bands like Alestorm. That being said, it's also pretty clear that they are only in their beginning phases as a group, the production is limited and the vocal delivery is not always top notch. However the melodic content is great and the lyrics are very fun. See, while Ol' Jolly Roger may still be refining their sound, they certainly understand what pirate metal is all about and this really allows them to come forth and shine. They even bring in some cool new ideas with their 8 bit version of one of their tracks (Crack Jenny's Teacup) While this demo may only have two songs (but three tracks) it shows a lot of potential. I'm excited to hear what happens when Ol' Jolly Roger hit the studio and put out something with a bit more of a run time!

Find them on Facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/folkjollyroger

Cave Growl-Something Drunk

I've always been a bit of a sucker for folk metal, there is an earthy magic here that when combined with glorious metal riffs is not something to be taken lightly. It is precisely for that reason that I adore Cave Growls debut record Something Drunk a tribute to the hard partying bands like Alestorm and Korpiklaani. Yet there is something more to this bands sound, there are progressive elements that set Cave Growl aside from the best acts and make them into something even more powerful and magic, a band who are capable of giving new life to the Folk Metal scene.

As I said before there are a few main things that really set this record apart and make it unique. While the first layer is rather standard, fun dancing parts with great riffs there is a lot more to love here. The progressive nature of the songs gives the band a lot more room to play with musical elements, this gives tracks like Struggle of Life a lot more flavor and keeps them poignant. The sing a long choruses are a lot of fun too, they give ridiculous amounts of flavor to tracks like Captain Blackbeard (Which also features an Alestorm twist). In short, Something Drunk has all of the elements needed to make a great party folk metal record and they do it with aplomb making a triumphant tribute to the magic of the genre.

To wrap it all up, if your looking for a glorious folk metal album that tells tales of battles and beer (Or both, as the the song Battle's Beer does) then Something Drunk is the record for you. A band who are just starting to make it big I hope that these French folk metal warriors succeed in sharing their wondrous metal message. Their proggy elements should never be stifled! While there could be some polishing of the tracks there is a lot to love on Something Drunk and I think it could very well be the debut of something grand, of a band capable of taking the world of folk metal to a new, and more progressive, level.

Find them on Facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Cave-Growl/272324139444385?fref=ts

Elmsfeuer-Schatzsuche

Metal has always been a large and highly diverse genre with literally something for everyone. Now, I've long been a fan of pirate metal bands like Alestorm and Swashbuckled but the vastness of the metal genre can only be fully realized when one accepts that their is German language Pirate Metal, and not only does it exist, but it's quite fabulous indeed. Elmsfeuers new album Schatzsuche is an explosive record filled with piratey melodies and a healthy love for alcohol. This set of 12 tracks (And an intro) is a lot of fun to listen too and shows the enduring might of the German scene.

The songwriting on this record is very solid, much like with bands like Alestorm the main body of the track revolves around the accordion and violin melodies which help to give the records their 'pirate' quality. Admittedly this band is a lot less metal than some of their other pirate metal contemporaries, in fact they remind me a bit of Lagerstein. I'd also like to call attention the absolutely stellar production which attracts the ear from the first crash of the waves on the introductory track. This excellent mix really allows the band to shine and display what they're truly capable of.

If you're looking for a wonderful way to spend your Saturday afternoon look no further. This is a tight album that should resonate with any lover of the legends of Blackbeard and Captain Jack. Accessible to fans of both trve folk metal and modern rock Elmsfeuer is a blast to listen too and their powerful swashbuckling melodies will keep you occupied for at least a few spins. Another great addition to the burgeoning global pirate metal scene I hope that one day soon Elmsfeuer have the chance to sail the seven seas and take their own brand of metal across the globe, they certainly deserve it!

Find them on Facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Elmsfeuer-Band/166875366712979

Fisherman's Death

Fisherman's Death is a viking-esque melodic death metal band very much in the vein of Amon Amarth, but with more of a pirate feel. Their song Davy Jones Locker is essentially what would happen if Amon Amarth decided to be pirates for a day. I find this to actually be kind of amazing and to have a lot of flavor. The guitar parts are powerful and filled with lots of cool folky melodies. I really like the way they fit under the choral parts. It adds a lot of depth and might to the music. Meanwhile the bass work is rather heavy and really shines on some of the destructive rhythm attacks. Speaking of which, this bands drummer has the double bass charge down. He can continue his attack for minutes on end while adding some pretty cool fills on top. He is exactly what a folk metal drummer should be, capable of everything, including ridiculous amounts of double bass. The growls are vicious and have a lot of that brutal death metal might to them that makes bands like Skyforger so cool. They add a true viking layer and carry you back to a manlier time. The singers growls are really wonderful and well enunciated. The lyrics are actually rather easy to understand! Overall, Fisherman's Death is an awesome folk metal band with a sound that is hard to forget. So go check them out!

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Fishermans-Death/157581200920237?sk=app_178091127385

Lagerstein

Time for a review of Lagerstein a pirate metal band from Brisbane(wow, today sure turned out folk metally). This is a band that incorporates a lot of the melodies of the age of piracy but gives them more of a rock feel than Alestorm or Swashbuckled. Their sound is surprisingly symphonic, powerful, and beautiful. This is a truly magnificent album that is worth many a listen. The riffs are often rather piratey in tone. At times they have a symphonic black metal feel to them. Yet they have an overall rock feel that means that mainstream fans can enjoy them too. The bass work is very solid and the crazy bass fills are very tasty. This bands bassist is given a lot of leeway and he really ends up shining on some of these tracks. The drumming is very solid and incorporates a lot of folk rhythms as well as metal ones. This creates a rather unique sound that is very listenable. The keyboard work is very symphonic at times and melodic at others. It achieves a good balance but ensures that everything has a strong pirate feel. Finally we have the vocals, with a powerful clean voice the singer of this group can really belt it. And while I might prefer some more grit from a pirate metal vocalist he is definitely good enough. The parts where all the band sings together are by far my favorite as they get a very earthy feel to them and add to the seafaring element. So go check out Lagerstein, the newest act on the pirate metal ship!

https://www.facebook.com/lagerstein

Back Through Time-Alestorm

This album, is far and away the album of the year. I don't care if Sabbath releases an album this year, it will have nothing on this piece of brilliance handed down to us from the gods of metal. This Alestorm album is ridiculous and yet the best thing ever. IT is TRUE ROCK AND ROLL! This album captures the true MAGIC of ROCK! Its not just the instruments and the vocals (both of which are great) of this album that make it true Rock but the back story of the band as well as the sheer narmyness of the lyrics. This is the first album that I have heard in a very long time that triggers a feeling of awe from me. This is Alestorm's coming of age. This album represents Alestorm becoming a real band! THIS IS ALESTORM'S TRIUMPHANT ALBUM! When you get the back story of this band you then realize how much more rock and roll they are, they are the luckiest people ever, yet they stand for what rock and roll is.

Alestorm started out small, they were going to play a show at a bar and out of sheer apathy only told a couple friends about it. When they arrived to play the show the bar was packed out the doors. Even at their first show they were loved because they represented a new and magical type of rock and roll, PIRATE METAL. They didn't even have to fight to get signed, they just sent some demo's in and got a record deal! So what makes these guys so Rock and Roll? It's their sheer attitude. Their sheer, rebellion. But lot's of bands have sheer rebellions, so they add in a new layer, they create sounds that have never been heard before, they are the most piratey of the pirate metal bands and they create an aura that is so beautiful and so magic that I am filled with AWE.

Rock and Metal have both become so stale recently you wonder what has happened, but then you get a group like Alestorm, at first they seem like a bunch of idiots, but then you listen to them and realize that they are one of the greatest things to happen to the metal scene in this millennium! They bring both raw energy and rebelliousness to a novel sound! Alestorm is the most Rock and Roll band in this millennium! No other band has cared less than them and no other band is better. You may say that they are a bunch of spoiled brats but I tell you that they are geniuses. They know that music needs something beautiful and fresh and they give it to us! People said Iggy Pop was a spoiled brat, and he was, but he also gave birth to punk. Alestorm is perfectly capable of creating a whole new direction for rock and roll!

The sound on the first 2 minutes of this album show huge evolution in the bands sound. They have finally found balance between the synthesizer and the guitar sound. On the first album the guitars were too powerful and they controlled the music too much. The second album had barely any guitar work at all. This album finds the perfect balance, this album is a beautiful combination of all that makes Alestorm great on an instrumental level. The synthesizer and the guitar find balance. This is the first album where the guitar just goes and creates metal riffs and allows the synth to do all the piratey bits. This creates an amazing feel, we finally can respect the guitarist because there is a perfect combination here.

In addition the rhythm sections is no longer holding anything back, on the last two albums there were lots of bits were the rhythm section had to hold back for extended periods of time, but now with a high powered guitar the rhythm section has become a hugely powerful and dynamic section creating an extremely powerful sound. The tempos are now ragingly fast and they give this record a lot more power than previous ones by Alestorm. Also, there are real bass fills here! It provides a bit of juxtaposition in the music and bass fills are generally just amazing.

That is not to say that Alestorm has totally left behind their old sound, there are still lots of excellent pirate bits but they are just better now that the band has found true balance and sped up the tempos. Still fans of songs like “At the end of the Age” will find something to enjoy in the song “Scraping the Barrel”. Whose lyrics declare that Alestorm will never run out of material, they will always scrape the barrel for more music. While there is much evolution on this album, the sound still respects its pirate roots but it emphasizes the best bits, sing a long choruses and sick synthesizers, with guitar licks and a pounding rhythm section.

Another thing that often stays the same are the lyrics. They are as always ridiculous and always retain their piratey flair. Often though they make me laugh at loud, they are simply brilliant. One example is on the track Midget Saw, the name says it all. It is a song about a midget, sung by a pirate. HOW DO YOU BEAT THAT? HOW DO YOU GET MORE RIDICULOUS AND MORE ROCK AND ROLL THAN A BAND THAT IS WILLING TO SING ABOUT A MIDGET STOMPING ON A MONKEY? This band lets go of it all in its lyrics, they capture the pirate magic and give the music such a, insane and disturbing beauty that I just smile in admiration at this band. I mean the song “Rum” has the chorus, “Rum Rum, Give me more Rum, Rum Rum Ahoy!”. How do you get more rock and roll than smelly rapscallions running around looking for booze?

The vocals are also some of the best that I have heard in a while. Bowes is an actor, he captures the pirate aura with his vocals. He is so rebellious and so rock and roll that you start to feel embarrassed for him, then you realize that this is his goal, and he has won. His vocals will win against you every time. He is the metal pirate king and no one will ever be able to match that. The sheer pirateyness of the vocals blows my head off every time I listen to this band and it is why they have become one of my favorites. If you have never heard Bowes sing before, go listen now, if you want to hear the best new metal vocals go listen to this album.

The point I feel obligated to get across is that Alestorm has found themselves. They have discovered their sound on this album and if they keep this sound I could listen to them for a million years and not grow weary of them. They have a lot of beautiful things and they make the best of all of them on this album. They have sing a long choruses, excellent guitar work, and a novel sound. They are some of the last true rockers, they are some of the last true innovators because they truly get the point of rock and roll. Have a unique sound and have an amazing attitude. And they have that attitude, they say to society “Screw you, we're going to do our own thing, stare if you must, but we are still going to do this!”

All in all this is an incredible band that has a most incredible sound and if you do not like them I will rip your head off and feed it to a midget. A MIDGET! They are some of the last true rockers! They are some of the last rock heroes worth worshipping because they have a novel sound and a screw you attitude! Their sound has evolved so much it is amazing. The guitar is incredible now, there are killer solos and the synthesizer gives the songs a unique feel. And now with the balance between the two of them their sound is quite easily the best in the modern metal scene. They are aided by their rhythm section which now has a much greater attack and gives the songs a lot more energy. These guys are amazing rockers and you NEED to go listen.

OVERALL 10/10

Back to the Noose-Swashbuckle

 Well it seems that somehow today became Pirate Metal day, so yeah, hope you liked it. Tonight I am reviewing an excellent thrash/hardcore punk band called Swashbuckle. There are epic guitar riffs that keep the thrash feel coming. The bass is rock steady and fairly good if a tad, uncreative. The drums are pretty awesome there are a lot of excellent drum fills which vary from your typical battered 16ths. The vocals are harsh and reminiscent of hardcore punk than thrash metal. The main pirate feel of this music comes in through the lyrics which talk about life on the high sees. However there are some times when the guitar comes and adds a piratey feel.

The guitar typically uses some extremely powerful and heavy hardcore punk riffs however it definitely experiments with different styles that make it sound unique. As a whole though the riffs are very well done and reminiscent of Slayer and Anthrax. They are very powerful and fast and are often battered out quickly. In addition to the killer riffs there are some pretty awesome solos that are very thrash like including a lot of cool tapping bits. The bass is solid and often carries the music because well, they're a power trio. The drums are amazingly solid and have an awesome sound with their heavy and powerful sound. They use a lot of unique fills and I like them a lot for their originality.

The vocals on this album are borderline death metal. While these are definitely growls going on here it is not really possible to call them Death Metal as they are just a tad to light. So the vocals are firmly rooted in the hardcore punk rage, sounding a bit like Slayer at times. In short the vocals are pretty awesome. However they do not capture the folksy piratey feel as seen in Running Wild and Alestorm. The lyrics are pretty good and have a very piratey sound. They evolve over the course opf the album and tell a story about a pirate's life and death. Overall the vocals and lyrics come together for a solid sound.

This is a good album and I think that a lot of people should check this album and band out. They have a hard and solid sound reminiscent of thrash as well as hardcore punk. However they are not afraid to experiment. One of the biggest advantages of this album is the short song length which keeps things staying original and fresh. The guitar is soaring and has some killer slayer-esque riffs. The bass is powerful and often carries the band. The drums are very well done and often original and generally awesome. The vocals are heavy and borderline death metal, they have some nice pirate themed lyrics. All in all these guys come together to create a great album.

OVERALL 8.5/10

Under Jolly Roger-Running Wild

 Now I am reviewing another pirate metal band, this time it is the Pirate pioneers Running Wild. Their album Under Jolly Roger pretty much kicked off the pirate metal album. This album has a cool raw and raunchy sound that makes the music seem dirty and scratchy and thus very piratey. The guitar is powerful and a main player in the music. The bass is solid and uninspired however it does a good job keeping time with the drums. The vocals are nice and growly, and there are extremely piratey lyrics. All together the different aspects of this album create a rather piratey feel, however it is not as piratey as Alestorm for example. Still this is a good album with some nice guitar solos.

The guitar on this album has a classic power metal feel. The majority of the riffs are textbook power metal. They are not overly amazing but they are still good enough to merit some honor. The solos are average at best they do not feature any amazing fills that would go on to define music. No, this album just has some solid power metal riffs with some mildly cool intro solos. The bass is solid but not overly inspiring it just comes off as kinda, meh. The drums are actually pretty good they have some good basic fills, however they do get repetitive. Overall the instrumentalists on this album are good but nothing to rave about.

The vocals are made up of light death growls. They are very reminiscent of the pirate days of the 1600's. There is something of a old man of the sea feel to them. Unfortunately they do not feel very realistic, possibly because the singer can not do a good accent that can mimic a true pirate. The quality of his growls is okay and the lyrics are easily intelligible. The lyrics are the true redeeming point of this album. They are pretty original and gave influence to many pirate metal bands. This band planted the idea that we should base metal off the coolest people ever, pirates. Asides from the lyrics this band is only an average metal band.

Overall this is an okay album with killer lyrics that make it awesome. The guitar is okay, it does not have any mind blowing solos or riffs but it does alright for itself. The bass is steady but uninspired and makes the music boring. The drums have some creativity but on this album its not uncommon to hear the same fill for a full minute. The vocals are okay but nothing to rave over, the best part about this album is the lyrics and without the lyrics this album would be like 4/10. All in all this album is okay at best however it is important for planting the seeds of an idea that would go on to create an awesome genre.

OVERALL 6/10

Black Sails at Midnight-Alestorm

 ARRR, it be SatARRday morning and I be reviewing some good old Pirate Metal! Yes Alestorm, one of the most notable names in the growing Pirate Metal album. We all know pirate's make everything better and that includes power metal. This music distinctly reminds me of the classic Pirates of the Carribean movies. This album oozes sweat and grime and a generally awesome pirate feel which makes it awesome to listen too. The guitar places an emphasis on galloping rhythms, the bass is also often galloping, the drums are okay, but consist almost entirely of 16ths on the toms. There is also a synth which helps to add a piratey feel to the music with it's great musicality. The vocals include both slight growls and clean singing and seem very piratey. Overall this is a great album with a killer guitar.

The guitar has a very interesting sound on this album. It typically focuses on galloping rhythms however it can sometimes have melodic/folk guitar parts that are very reminiscent of Waylander. Overall the guitar does not give the music the piratey magic, however it is very good. In particular it has a couple brilliant solos. The bass is solid but uninspired often doing the same thing as the guitar or just putting in a 16^th note fill. The drums are also decent but they too rarely deviate from their 16^th note fills. When they leave their typical fills behind both the bass and drums can both shine and do very well. The keyboards are what really adds the beauty to the music. Because they can be told to do horn parts they really add a lot of that ol' piratey goodness to the music. As much as I typically hate synths this album shows that they can have their uses.

The vocals are very interesting, they truly capture pirateness. They have a light death growl style. The death growls are reminiscent of what the voice of the stereotypical 'old man of the sea' would sound like. The vocals are slightly angry, but anger is not the dominant emotion as it might be in a thrash album. The Scottish accent of the lead singer Christopher Bowes bleeds through his growls and makes the music sound particularly piratey. The lyrics are always pirate based and very enjoyable. Some songs are about beer, others are about forcing people to walk the plank. All of them retain that piratey feel that makes Alestorm so good.

All in all this is a really nice album with an awesome sound. There is a killer guitar sound, which focuses on some cool galloping rhythms. The gallpoing guitar rhythms help lead the music. The bass also is often galloping. The drums are solid if often unoriginal. The synthesizer proves that synths can be amazing, it truly makes the music piratey. The vocals are moderate growls and have a nice feel, in particular the lyrics are great and extremely enjoyable to listen too. In short Alestorm is a metal band with an ever growing fan base for a reason. Their sound is helping to create an entirely new genre of metal, and a really cool genre at that.

OVERALL 9/10